Meet me in my dreams, Love
Let us join hands as always
And walk in your Heaven
Show me around your life's work
To the place you graduated
Where you reaped the rewards you so longed for
And we're all trying to get to.
Let us escape into a realm where reality is a cloud, far far away
All I want is US
In a still moment where our seamless harmony made butterflies dance
Where our whispers spoke volumes to each other's desires
I miss...this.
Meet me in my dreams, Love
Allow our reunion to comfort my soul
For my heart to be whole yet again
Even if it's mere mindplay
I need a brief fallacy to soothe my dark nights
For you knighted me with the gift of holding your heart
And I did so, willingly and without complaint
Life was light and so were my steps through our path
And now as I walk alone
I yearn for your warmth by my side.
Meet me in my dreams, Love
I need your hand once more to stroke my hair
Comb over my brokenness
Smooth my edges of sadness
Remove the strands of doubt that I'll never be cherished like this again
Help me see clearly through this cold season
And continue to look upward and onward as you did.
Your touch healed mountains of mishaps
Your words calmed seas of unease
With minimal yet powerful words:
I'm here.
And you still are
I hear you tell me to breathe when I'm stressed
I hear you say "ignore foolishness" when there's nonsensical unrest
I see your joy when snowflakes hit the ground
I feel you swaying me with your favorite gospel sounds
You are here!
I know this
Yet my tears fall into a boundless pool of unfulfilled destiny
Streams of my sorrow track the face you deemed "beautiful with HD eyes"
So, realize I catch myself looking for you, Love.
My slumber throws a nightly plea
A begging that we can meet, repeat and add on
To a story written so beautifully and effortlessly
But sometimes a pen loses ink
Leaving one to think "how could it have ended"
However I cherish our commas and spaces no one sees between our parentheses
And for those I thank you, Love
So for this night, and many
Please steal me away
Refresh me with your presence
That made my heart beam
And meet me in my dreams.
3/9/14
12/26/13
Time
Time, I need to talk to you
If you’d please grant me your wares
I know they are priceless
Yet if you could offer me credit
I’d take anything you offer
for more moments with him.
Time, how frugal you were with us
I thought we had more pieces of you banked
Into our accounts of dreams and future goals
We were so sure we budgeted enough to insure us for a lifetime
But you had a different plan
Rendering us bankrupt before we played our full game.
Oh, time how cruel you can be
I know we borrowed, robbed and try to cheat our way to get more of you
But it was all for Love.
So, it was fair. Right?
For love, we put in all our chips
Rested on faith
Leaned on the Lord
Prayed for more of you to enter our lives
To, bless us with the manifestation of aspirations discussed
To create a blending of the best parts of us
More boundless bliss
But our fingertips lost our grip on you
We tried everything to hold onto you
And you, Time, you fled us in the night
Blindsighted by your trickery
I was knocked senseless into the reality
That you were indeed not on my side.
Time…you fickle spinster of joy and pain
What more could I have done?
I was loyal to you and cherished you to the fullest
I packed much purpose into the gift you gave me with him
And you played with me.
Dangled the carrot and I bit down so hard and fast
That we were speechless with happiness
Now, Time, I know I gripped you by the reins
And begged you to grant me things you could not
For you knew the answers and held them close to your heart
So I know I’m asking for an oasis in the desert of my mind
That yearns for his love to keep refreshing me
But please allow my irrational plea
And wish that I had more of you
For Us.
If you’d please grant me your wares
I know they are priceless
Yet if you could offer me credit
I’d take anything you offer
for more moments with him.
Time, how frugal you were with us
I thought we had more pieces of you banked
Into our accounts of dreams and future goals
We were so sure we budgeted enough to insure us for a lifetime
But you had a different plan
Rendering us bankrupt before we played our full game.
Oh, time how cruel you can be
I know we borrowed, robbed and try to cheat our way to get more of you
But it was all for Love.
So, it was fair. Right?
For love, we put in all our chips
Rested on faith
Leaned on the Lord
Prayed for more of you to enter our lives
To, bless us with the manifestation of aspirations discussed
To create a blending of the best parts of us
More boundless bliss
But our fingertips lost our grip on you
We tried everything to hold onto you
And you, Time, you fled us in the night
Blindsighted by your trickery
I was knocked senseless into the reality
That you were indeed not on my side.
Time…you fickle spinster of joy and pain
What more could I have done?
I was loyal to you and cherished you to the fullest
I packed much purpose into the gift you gave me with him
And you played with me.
Dangled the carrot and I bit down so hard and fast
That we were speechless with happiness
Now, Time, I know I gripped you by the reins
And begged you to grant me things you could not
For you knew the answers and held them close to your heart
So I know I’m asking for an oasis in the desert of my mind
That yearns for his love to keep refreshing me
But please allow my irrational plea
And wish that I had more of you
For Us.
10/23/13
He Is My...
There are times we don't know what to call someone so special to us...boyfriend sounds like we're extremely young. Man sounds like...well, "man". We could call someone our mate, partner, ace, best friend...all of these things. Or, you could describe until one tires of you singing the praises of your love. This is my take on a very special person who left the world much too soon:
No one word can describe the volume and magnitude of his meaning to me
so I see it necessary to express the depths of his
imprint stamped on my heart.
He is my…
unlimited joy enveloped in brown skin
and a grin that melts the frozen parts of me.
He is my…
heart’s desires manifested in a surreal reality
moving me to ponder whether I am actually awake.
He is my…
every boundless dream imaginable yet finally within my reach
teaching me to forever strive for infinite possibilities
and never settle.
He is my…
rhythm in my strut, wind in my hair
for he makes me feel light
like I’m traveling on a butterfly’s wings.
He is my…
song I sing effortlessly and flawlessly
for the beauty is in the passion of the melody
not in the precision of being perfect.
I hit notes loud and right because he sees the best in me.
He is…
my radiant smile at the silliest things
He is…
my hips moving to the harmony we create in silence
He is…
more than a friend though such a foundation created this very moment
He is…
not my boyfriend for this is a Man
in every sense of the word.
From his maturity to his integrity
to the way his stride reflects wisdom in his young years.
A walk that evokes tears
by just the sheer knowledge of the hills and valleys he’s endured.
I see so much in store for
He is my…
vision I never dared to share with anyone else
for their sight was blinded by doubt and fear
But here he and I are and it’s so hard to know what to call him
I just know he is my…
Happiness in the staccato of my heartbeat
when his presence shines over my past pain
I will no longer refrain from calling him my…
Strong climax of multiple emotions
washing refreshing waves over my eroded hope.
He is my…
unlocked and untapped bliss
Breaking chains that had me rooted
in a murky existence.
He is my…
Clarity in simplicity.
My…Honesty with delicate delivery.
My…Gentleness in the eye of the storm.
For our climate is peaceful
no matter the seasons we encounter.
We even dance in the rain
appreciating God’s droplets that
leave our souls renewed and ready to conquer any challenge.
He is my…
Twinkle in these dark brown eyes
Taking in this unhindered view with new lenses.
He is my…
Provider of emotional safety
My…supporter of individuality
My…safe space to just BE.
Hence, my hesitation in naming him
Is not a minimization of his importance
I deem it the complete opposite
for it is a reflection, an introspection
a pause in my inability to be concise.
My life is and will forever be shifted by this…
By him.
where I can only find presumptuous comfort in simply calling him
my Future.
9/22/13
Thank You
On the day I discovered my home church in September 2013, all of these feelings gushed out. It was very important that I do this for myself and I went alone. I immediately knew it was where I was supposed to be. When I arrived home, this is what came out:
Washing your grace and glory over me.
I feel weak with the evil You are ripping out of me with every sob
I feel You deep within my soul
mending broken seams
It seems I've been distant, not away just not as close as I should be to You
So these tears are an apology
A decree that I thank you for welcoming me back Lord
I've stored up so many shortcomings and masked them with foundation and blush
But the foundation is You.
You brought forth these tears
So that my true self is revealed
Humbled and bowed down before You
Swaying me with melodies of praise and worship
Praying the seeds You've bestowed upon me
Are sewn in your Image
Your light.
I wish my salt to sprinkle upon those who need me
And with your help, I will walk your path.
Lord, the heaves overtaking my small frame
Are a reminder that things are so much bigger than me
Hence I receive what is happening to me physically
Is only the start of what You will be to me in this Light
Darkness is defined as merely the absence of light
So please shine your beam over the corners that no one else dare touch
Illuminate the dank, foul pieces of me that have spoiled
Heal me.
Restore me.
I implore thee, please keep showing me the way
I walked into your house today feeling lost yet guided
And was provided such warmth and welcoming that I knew your hand held mine as I took steps in.
You carried me and said
"Listen my child, I love you."
"Let my earthly disciples speak my words"
”Hear Me.”
And with that, streams poured out
Not of sadness
But a release that finally, I am where you want me
A release that halted resistance
I felt no shame as your beams bursted out within me
Displayed in life's water
I welcome it.
Please continue to work on me, Lord
And however I show my gratitude
I know you will receive it with open arms
Just as your vessels did with me today
Thank you.
9/3/13
Is It Okay?
Is it okay that I…
With questions swirling, twirling new experiences in my mind
Like my favorite cream in my coffee
Warming my insides as you do
And calming my tides as only you can
I need to know...
Is it okay to be in love with you now?
The timing and things left undefined
Minding my needs as if you are more than what you are…
So far I'm loving my heartbeat's staccato
And songs that stick in my head describing you
And so much you give me by simply being you
Being true to your words and truer to your heart
So I wonder if I'm ahead of myself
Or mindfully ahead of what I already know will be
Will we feel this way ...forever?
Whether it’s the now or the here we may be in a year's time
I can no longer hide from what my insides are screaming to you.
It's wise to silence this in the midst of my touch and kiss
And hope you hear me out
Please read my sighs between the lines and cries to you that
I never and I mean never have been so affected...
Reflecting back on the past trips to Oz
I never knew where I was going and neither did they
They were missing crucial pieces that would have left me dead if I gave it.
A brain refraining from constant ridicule
A heart full of unconditional giving
The courage to say any of this
Yet you are filling my chalice to the brim
Making me marvel at how good Home feels
Sipping, simmering me down as emotions boil over
You receive them all.
Not questioning my mindplay bouncing around life's pinball machine
Hoping I have one more life left
To try again and actually win
To actually think I can have all that I put in
The joy output is immeasurable
Pleasurable sensations overtake my psyche
And this might be the best feeling I've ever...
Is this okay to say this now?
I'm done arm-wrestling this blissful revelation
Elation washes over any fears I have of jumping over the moon and shouting from the stars
That this constellation was written before we ever realized
Pieces of the sun shine in my eyes when I gaze at a rarity such as you
Your touch tickles fantasies
Plans that we could do this for more than a reason or a season
But to have all this in me now...
I'm scared.
With questions swirling, twirling new experiences in my mind
Like my favorite cream in my coffee
Warming my insides as you do
And calming my tides as only you can
I need to know...
Is it okay to be in love with you now?
The timing and things left undefined
Minding my needs as if you are more than what you are…
So far I'm loving my heartbeat's staccato
And songs that stick in my head describing you
And so much you give me by simply being you
Being true to your words and truer to your heart
So I wonder if I'm ahead of myself
Or mindfully ahead of what I already know will be
Will we feel this way ...forever?
Whether it’s the now or the here we may be in a year's time
I can no longer hide from what my insides are screaming to you.
It's wise to silence this in the midst of my touch and kiss
And hope you hear me out
Please read my sighs between the lines and cries to you that
I never and I mean never have been so affected...
Reflecting back on the past trips to Oz
I never knew where I was going and neither did they
They were missing crucial pieces that would have left me dead if I gave it.
A brain refraining from constant ridicule
A heart full of unconditional giving
The courage to say any of this
Yet you are filling my chalice to the brim
Making me marvel at how good Home feels
Sipping, simmering me down as emotions boil over
You receive them all.
Not questioning my mindplay bouncing around life's pinball machine
Hoping I have one more life left
To try again and actually win
To actually think I can have all that I put in
The joy output is immeasurable
Pleasurable sensations overtake my psyche
And this might be the best feeling I've ever...
Is this okay to say this now?
I'm done arm-wrestling this blissful revelation
Elation washes over any fears I have of jumping over the moon and shouting from the stars
That this constellation was written before we ever realized
Pieces of the sun shine in my eyes when I gaze at a rarity such as you
Your touch tickles fantasies
Plans that we could do this for more than a reason or a season
But to have all this in me now...
I'm scared.
The barriers make more than complete sense
But my heart doesn't listen and when you touch her core
She loses all logic.
Loses all grips on reality
Fingertips slipping off deliberate intention
Splashing into waves lacking any prevention of
Making premature moves.
Dare we float without an oar to shores of unlimited passion?
Crash into once barren islands of disappointment and build from there?
Bare our souls' fears and walk around naked without shame?
Share our tears into a cup filled with promise
Letting that quench our overflowing desire for each other.
Will you soothe the rough edges of my hesitance?
Erode uneven patches until we melt into each other seamlessly
I beg thee please stay with me on the edge of vulnerability
Hold my hand as I gaze over the cliff
Rifts and ripples of blue caressing the rocks
As I address these blocks in my mind
The water looks so lovely and welcoming
Like the fountain of youth erasing the bitter
Sweet nectar of truth delighting my taste buds
I feel renewed.
But my heart doesn't listen and when you touch her core
She loses all logic.
Loses all grips on reality
Fingertips slipping off deliberate intention
Splashing into waves lacking any prevention of
Making premature moves.
Dare we float without an oar to shores of unlimited passion?
Crash into once barren islands of disappointment and build from there?
Bare our souls' fears and walk around naked without shame?
Share our tears into a cup filled with promise
Letting that quench our overflowing desire for each other.
Will you soothe the rough edges of my hesitance?
Erode uneven patches until we melt into each other seamlessly
I beg thee please stay with me on the edge of vulnerability
Hold my hand as I gaze over the cliff
Rifts and ripples of blue caressing the rocks
As I address these blocks in my mind
The water looks so lovely and welcoming
Like the fountain of youth erasing the bitter
Sweet nectar of truth delighting my taste buds
I feel renewed.
My fire red mood blends with your mellow yellow
We glow copper and watch our suns set in a view so breathtaking
you wish time would slow down to catch every hue.
We burst into rainbows
Bellowing joyous melodies blending into an unrehearsed harmony.
Even our hums sing notes we could boast reach octaves uncharted
Your bass clef hooks me into a groove so moving
Swaying me in rhythmic beats such that
I could dance on you all night
My only fright is...is this stance too soon?
The chance to swoon and fan myself comes often
Even in an empty room, your impression on me is jarring
For you to have a starring role in what I hold so close to me is…
I certainly don’t mind
I just find myself fighting my words
So contradictory to who I am
And I wish to save some things for the moment where we put a dead bolt on this lock and key that already fits so secure
Closing the door to any permeations
Invasions from others that envy even our beginning
My wheels are spinning at the infinite possibilities of us
But I trust the pace, the space we’ve placed between us and around us
Allowing our untouched meadows to be tended and tilled until…
I will continue to let them cultivate and grow
For now please allow all non-verbals to be the absolute truth
We glow copper and watch our suns set in a view so breathtaking
you wish time would slow down to catch every hue.
We burst into rainbows
Bellowing joyous melodies blending into an unrehearsed harmony.
Even our hums sing notes we could boast reach octaves uncharted
Your bass clef hooks me into a groove so moving
Swaying me in rhythmic beats such that
I could dance on you all night
My only fright is...is this stance too soon?
The chance to swoon and fan myself comes often
Even in an empty room, your impression on me is jarring
For you to have a starring role in what I hold so close to me is…
I certainly don’t mind
I just find myself fighting my words
So contradictory to who I am
And I wish to save some things for the moment where we put a dead bolt on this lock and key that already fits so secure
Closing the door to any permeations
Invasions from others that envy even our beginning
My wheels are spinning at the infinite possibilities of us
But I trust the pace, the space we’ve placed between us and around us
Allowing our untouched meadows to be tended and tilled until…
I will continue to let them cultivate and grow
For now please allow all non-verbals to be the absolute truth
And if our paths bring us “here” one day
There will be a lot I need to tell you.
There will be a lot I need to tell you.
7/17/13
Roses
At times, people in relationships get complacent and feel like efforts 'after the fact' will work. Sometimes they do, but other times they do not, due to the pain endured during their time together. There is a fear of returning and being vulnerable to that person in a way where they could potentially be hurt again. In reading this, my hope is that you remember how fragile love is...just as fragile as life is.
I suppose if this were my homegoing I'd receive a glowing bouquet from you as well
But this has gone to hell... And I get roses
Smelling as bittersweet as the oxymoron it is
I love the red and pink hues and dislike you in the same line
But that's how we always worked, isn't it?
Now that I've welcomed Genesis you have a Revelation that I was your whole world
But Now that it has ended, I get roses?
In a clear vase as breakable as the house you threw your stones from
Pieces get scattered when they've been shattered to dust
Quicksand can't be picked up by any broom bare of bristles
But my hands come together for you
Snaps and claps resounding from my fingertips as I pluck petals
Fretting the answer to "he loves me", "he loves me not"
I know what it is but this... Is too late
The season has passed for these flowers to flourish
My grounds are hibernating, healing for new seeds
So these...Will last maybe a week.
Just enough time for me to have a brief weak moment
For my heart strings to ring a familiar tune
For me to remember the room you kept in my soul
Before I cleaned shop and stopped being for Sale
So this... Is temporary.
As infrequent as the "I love you"s
As barren as the emotional expression unless it was the fury
Any jury would say you are guilty of tap dancing when the curtains have closed so
I hear you... I just can't see you
Just as I can no longer see you as my future
The sutures to my heart barely had any stitches left to
Have and hold the love of another so I left in just enough time
Before I was completely devoid of any growth
Frozen like the tundra in Siberia
My grounds are hibernating, healing for new seeds
So these...Will last maybe a week.
Just enough time for me to have a brief weak moment
For my heart strings to ring a familiar tune
For me to remember the room you kept in my soul
Before I cleaned shop and stopped being for Sale
So this... Is temporary.
As infrequent as the "I love you"s
As barren as the emotional expression unless it was the fury
Any jury would say you are guilty of tap dancing when the curtains have closed so
I hear you... I just can't see you
Just as I can no longer see you as my future
The sutures to my heart barely had any stitches left to
Have and hold the love of another so I left in just enough time
Before I was completely devoid of any growth
Frozen like the tundra in Siberia
Theories have contended I like the sun much better
The beams refresh my dreams of brighter tomorrows forevermore
So this may be slightly impressive
Yet not progressive to the path I've chosen
I've freshly rewoven my reward pathways so I’m not weirdly addicted to pain
Acclimated to disappointment
Surprised by joy
Imagine that...
The web was so tangled it that right angles looked round
That silence was the best sound I ever heard
So I will dance to my heart beating lighter
Let new butterflies tickle the corner of my mouth
I shall look at these roses as a moment in time
A reminder that everything is great in its prime
Yet will die if not nurtured and cherished…
If not treated as richly as their first bloom
Even when the pinks and reds fade
So this…has had its run but I’m ready to let go
Throwing the last flower 6 feet below
As this phase of my life descends to peacefully rest
With this rose, I bid thee Adieu.
The beams refresh my dreams of brighter tomorrows forevermore
So this may be slightly impressive
Yet not progressive to the path I've chosen
I've freshly rewoven my reward pathways so I’m not weirdly addicted to pain
Acclimated to disappointment
Surprised by joy
Imagine that...
The web was so tangled it that right angles looked round
That silence was the best sound I ever heard
So I will dance to my heart beating lighter
Let new butterflies tickle the corner of my mouth
I shall look at these roses as a moment in time
A reminder that everything is great in its prime
Yet will die if not nurtured and cherished…
If not treated as richly as their first bloom
Even when the pinks and reds fade
So this…has had its run but I’m ready to let go
Throwing the last flower 6 feet below
As this phase of my life descends to peacefully rest
With this rose, I bid thee Adieu.
3/20/13
I Used To Know This Girl
I used to know this girl...
Big eyes, bigger heart
Flawless start
Wore a long white dress to the playground
Cuz she never got dirty
Played it safe
Watched all the other kids dive first
Get hurt
But not her...
Smoothed out her lace and ruffles
Trouble unknown to her perfect bubble
Watched from afar of how good, bad looked
But never partook
Content with a book and hope
She asked me if I would hold her hand
While she took in this new land
Area was uncharted
And she didn't want to start off wrong
Big eyes, bigger heart
Flawless start
Wore a long white dress to the playground
Cuz she never got dirty
Played it safe
Watched all the other kids dive first
Get hurt
But not her...
Smoothed out her lace and ruffles
Trouble unknown to her perfect bubble
Watched from afar of how good, bad looked
But never partook
Content with a book and hope
She asked me if I would hold her hand
While she took in this new land
Area was uncharted
And she didn't want to start off wrong
I agreed
Letting her know things would speed up at times
Like the merry go round she loved so much
Minus the levers
She couldn't help but touch
This ride would be different...
Letting her know things would speed up at times
Like the merry go round she loved so much
Minus the levers
She couldn't help but touch
This ride would be different...
Years passed on
Dress not so long
Had to cut the sleeves
So her body could breathe in
New experience
Now she's partially exposed
Soap can't wash off everything so
The dress had a new shade
Call it dingy reality
Actually got used to the sweat stains
Of pained truth
Life's proof that no one is invincible
Nor untouchable
Yes lovable, but
Ever permeable to
The up's and down of growing up
Dress not so long
Had to cut the sleeves
So her body could breathe in
New experience
Now she's partially exposed
Soap can't wash off everything so
The dress had a new shade
Call it dingy reality
Actually got used to the sweat stains
Of pained truth
Life's proof that no one is invincible
Nor untouchable
Yes lovable, but
Ever permeable to
The up's and down of growing up
I couldn't protect her like I wanted to
And it was heart-breaking
She kept making calls out to me
Screaming for help
Somewhere along the line
I put her needs on a shelf
Considered everyone else's
Concerned with what they thought
What they sought
Wasn't hard to tell…
I fought myself daily
In a present day hell
Over who to put first
Overwhelmed by the undying thirst for answers
Her voice cracked, crying for recognition
The position I put her in was unforgivable
Damn near unlivable
Yet she kept her trust in me
Regardless of my worthiness to
Be the protector of something so dear
Some days, she would just look at me
Wiping away tears
Failing at hiding the fear she encountered along the way
The little girl was still in there
Somewhere...
Though, something was missing
Her hair had a stench
Of liquor and lust
Substitutes for what her real path should have been
Her heart covered in rust
And she just looked at me...
And it was heart-breaking
She kept making calls out to me
Screaming for help
Somewhere along the line
I put her needs on a shelf
Considered everyone else's
Concerned with what they thought
What they sought
Wasn't hard to tell…
I fought myself daily
In a present day hell
Over who to put first
Overwhelmed by the undying thirst for answers
Her voice cracked, crying for recognition
The position I put her in was unforgivable
Damn near unlivable
Yet she kept her trust in me
Regardless of my worthiness to
Be the protector of something so dear
Some days, she would just look at me
Wiping away tears
Failing at hiding the fear she encountered along the way
The little girl was still in there
Somewhere...
Though, something was missing
Her hair had a stench
Of liquor and lust
Substitutes for what her real path should have been
Her heart covered in rust
And she just looked at me...
Those big eyes told a story of disappointment
Missed appointments of where the blessings were assigned
Told me rash decisions
Took her place in line
Every time they took a piece of her
She was willing to give it
Living off the hope of receiving the same
But that day never came
Unreciprocated efforts wittled her sweetness away
To nothingness
Always loving less than she deserved
Her people pleasing tendencies
Had her teasing her own emotions unfulfilled
Naïve to sleazy intentions
And her only prevention was to be alone
But that's not what her heart called home
She brought the dress back to me
Lying in a box
Said the only way to avoid further damage
Was to keep it sealed and locked
She didn't want to lose it
But leaving it out for everyone
Was a magnet for abuse
I asked her what she wore
She said she just tightens the belt around a black robe
When she answers the door
Don't get dressed no more
She knew what they were there for
And I just looked at her...
And it
The pure white frock had turned to a shade of brown
Like the kids from the park
Stomped it to the ground
The lace was gone
Ruffles lost their fluff
The delicate trim was wrinkled
This dress had had enough
At this point it was unwearable
Irreparable
The biggest patches known to man
Couldn't cover up the holes
Left by them stroking
Poking in their needs
And leaving her seeds to rot
Rarely nurtured by true love's moist soil
Relying on the rain to be her only spoil
While toiling to hold onto whatever's left in her
What's left in her?
A future where perhaps things would look up?
What luck she would have to run into
To build up her defeated trust
And she just looked at me...
Her hair was wet from the constant troubles
Showering down on head
She cowered in the corner of the tub instead of
Standing up and dealing with it
Finally she rose to her feet
Stopped bobbing to the beats of the wrong drums
She'd rather listen to HERSELF hum
The misguiding music was blaring so loud
That I could never hear her
I used my towel to wipe the fog off the mirror
Looked her deep into those big brown eyes
And told her, "I can't promise you anything but
I'll do my best to protect you better this time..."
Missed appointments of where the blessings were assigned
Told me rash decisions
Took her place in line
Every time they took a piece of her
She was willing to give it
Living off the hope of receiving the same
But that day never came
Unreciprocated efforts wittled her sweetness away
To nothingness
Always loving less than she deserved
Her people pleasing tendencies
Had her teasing her own emotions unfulfilled
Naïve to sleazy intentions
And her only prevention was to be alone
But that's not what her heart called home
She brought the dress back to me
Lying in a box
Said the only way to avoid further damage
Was to keep it sealed and locked
She didn't want to lose it
But leaving it out for everyone
Was a magnet for abuse
I asked her what she wore
She said she just tightens the belt around a black robe
When she answers the door
Don't get dressed no more
She knew what they were there for
And I just looked at her...
And it
The pure white frock had turned to a shade of brown
Like the kids from the park
Stomped it to the ground
The lace was gone
Ruffles lost their fluff
The delicate trim was wrinkled
This dress had had enough
At this point it was unwearable
Irreparable
The biggest patches known to man
Couldn't cover up the holes
Left by them stroking
Poking in their needs
And leaving her seeds to rot
Rarely nurtured by true love's moist soil
Relying on the rain to be her only spoil
While toiling to hold onto whatever's left in her
What's left in her?
A future where perhaps things would look up?
What luck she would have to run into
To build up her defeated trust
And she just looked at me...
Her hair was wet from the constant troubles
Showering down on head
She cowered in the corner of the tub instead of
Standing up and dealing with it
Finally she rose to her feet
Stopped bobbing to the beats of the wrong drums
She'd rather listen to HERSELF hum
The misguiding music was blaring so loud
That I could never hear her
I used my towel to wipe the fog off the mirror
Looked her deep into those big brown eyes
And told her, "I can't promise you anything but
I'll do my best to protect you better this time..."
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